May 30, 2003
Congratulations! Beta-tester for the Philips Recording Audio Jukebox HDD100
Congratulations! Beta-tester for the Philips Recording Audio Jukebox HDD100
Thank you very much for applying to be a beta-tester for Philips HDD100 Recording Audio
Jukebox. Thanks for your great support, the application process went smoothly and ended
successfully at 6:00 PM, Sunday, May 18 in Pacific Standard Time.
Unfortunately, this time your name was not selected in our random lucky draw. However, we
would like to assure you that there will be more beta-test opportunities in the near future, and that
you will be one of the first people to be informed of the event.
bollocks
May 29, 2003
check the 4th picture
UPDATE: The BBC have removed it! Never mind, I have a mirror....
Blair-Iraqi BJ 
The top 10 reasons for being...
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING FRENCH
1. When speaking fast you can make yourself sound gay.
2. Experience the joy of winning the world cup for the first time.
3. You get to eat insect food like snails and frog's legs.
4. If there's a war you can surrender really early.
5. You don't have to read the subtitles on those late night films on TV.
6. You can test your own nuclear weapons in other people's countries.
7. You can be ugly and still become a famous film star.
8. Allow Germans to march up and down your most famous street humiliating your sense of national pride.
9. You don't have to bother with toilets, just shit in the street.
10. People think you're a great lover even when you're not.
and more on the link below...
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING AMERICAN
1. You can have a woman president without electing her.
2. You can spell colour wrong and get away with it.
3. You can call Budweiser beer.
4. You can be a crook and still be president.
5. If you've got enough money you can get elected to do anything.
6. If you can breathe you can get a gun.
7. You get to be really obese.
8. You can play golf in the most hideous clothes ever made and nobody seems to care.
9. You get to call everyone you've never met "buddy"
10. You can think you're the greatest nation on earth.
10a. When you're not.
10b. At all.
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING ENGLISH
1. Two World Wars and One World Cup doo-dah doo-dah.
2. Proper beer.
3. You get to confuse everyone with the rules of cricket.
4. You get to accept defeat graciously in major sporting events
5. Union jack underpants.
6. Water shortages guaranteed every single summer.
7. You can live in the past and imagine you are still a world power.
8. Bathing once a week-whether you need to or not.
9. Ditto changing underwear
10. Beats being Welsh.
10a. Or Scottish
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING ITALIAN
1. In-depth knowledge of bizarre pasta shapes.
2. Unembarrassed to wear fur.
3. No need to worry about tax returns.
4. Glorious military history prior to 400 a.d.
5. Can wear sunglasses inside.
6. Political stability.
7. Flexible working hours.
8. Live near the Pope.
9. Can spend hours braiding girlfriend's armpit hair.
10. Country run by Sicilian murderers
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING SPANISH
1. Glorious history of killing South American tribes.
2. The rest of Europe thinks Africa begins at the Pyrenees.
3. You get your beaches invaded by Germans, Danes, Brits etc.
4. The rest of your country is already invaded by Moroccans.
5. Everybody else makes crap paella and claims it's the real thing.
6. Honesty
7. Only sure way of bedding a woman is to dress up in stupid, tight clothes and risk your life in front of bulls
8. You get to eat bulls' testicles.
9. Gibraltar.
10. Supported Argentina in Falklands War.
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING GERMAN
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING INDIAN
1. Chicken Madras
2. Lamb Passanda
3. Onion Bhaji
4. Bombay Potato
5. Chicken Tikka Masala
6. Rogan Josh
7. Popadoms
8. Chicken Dopiaza
9. Meat Boona
10. Kingfisher lager
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING WELSH
1. You've got to be having a laugh, haven't you?
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING IRISH
1. Guinness.
2. 18 children because you can't use contraceptives.
3. You can get into a fight just by marching down someone's road.
4. Pubs never close.
5. Can use Papal edicts on contraception passed in the second Vatican Council of 1968 to persuade your girlfriend that you can't have sex with a condom on.
6. No one can ever remember the night before.
7. Kill people you don't agree with.
8. Stew.
9. More Guinness.
10. Eating stew and drinking Guinness in an Irish pub at 3 in the morning after a bout of sectarian violence.
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING CANADIAN
1. It beats being an American.
2. Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground.
3. You can play hockey 12 months a year, outdoors.
4. Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground.
5. Where else can you travel 1000 miles over fresh water in a canoe?
6. A political leader can admit to smoking pot and his/her popularity ratings will rise.
7. Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground.
8. Kill Grizzly bears with huge shotguns and cover your house in their skins.
9. Own-an-Eskimo scheme.
10. Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground.
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING AUSTRALIAN
1. Know your great-grand-dad was a murdering bastard that no civilized nation on earth wanted.
2. Victoria Bitter
3. Dispossess Aborigines who have lived in your country for 40,000 years because you think it belongs to you.
4. Cricket captain not afraid to cry live on TV.
5. Tact and sensitivity.
6. Bondi Beach.
7. Other beaches.
8. Liberated attitude to homosexuals.
9. Drinking cold lager on the beach
10. Having a bit of a swim and then drink some cold lager on the beach.
Are you a pikey?
Are you a pikey... click the link below for the test...
NOTE: Pikey is NOT a racial group, the term is used to describe anyone who lives in a caravan or shares the same values and "culture" of "the travelling community", from urbandictionary.com
1. Have you ever purchased something from Bejam or Iceland?
2. Have you ever owned an electrical appliance made by Hinari?
3. Have you ever purchased a KFC family bucket?
4. Have you ever hung a pine fresh tree shaped air freshener on your rear view mirror?
5. Have you ever bought or worn shoes from Barratts?
6. Have you ever considered Pizza Hut an Italian Restaurant?
7. Have you ever bought Woolworths Ladybird clothes for kids?
8. Have you ever eaten a Findus Lasagne?
9. Have you ever worn jewellery from "Elizabeth Duke" at Argos?
10. Have you ever eaten a pot noodle?
11. Have you ever bought fresh cut flowers from a petrol station as a present?
12. Have you ever bought second class stamps?
13. Have you ever knowingly bought own brand cola?
14. Do you think Marks & Spencer's food hall is too expensive?
15. Have you ever taken a Stenaline Ferry anywhere?
16. Have you anything in your wardrobe which is at least 50% polyester?
17. Have you ever fantasised about owning a Ford Cosworth?
18. Are you on first name terms with any bus drivers?
19. Have you ever recommended a Berni Inn as a decent steak restaurant?
20. Have you ever relieved a hotel room of its freebie shower gel or shampoo?
21. Have you ever drunk a can of lager you found on a train?
22. Have you ever offered to buy a cigarette from someone?
23. Have you ever brought a screw top bottle of wine to a dinner party?
24. Have you ever referred to dessert as "afters"?
25. Have you ever worn the same pair of socks 2 days running?
26. Have you ever removed a boiled sweet or gum and saved it for later?
27. Have you ever left washing out on the line for more than 24 hours?
28. Have you ever dreamed of owning a Winnebago?
29. Have you ever christened your home with a name and then included it on your postal address ie "Dunroamin"
30. Have you ever bought a garden ornament from B&Q, ie stone squirrel, ornamental wheelbarrow etc
31. Have you ever owned an "eternal beau" dinner or tea service?
32. Have you ever owned or used a sausage dog draught excluder?
33. Have you ever erected a flashing snowman or fairy lights outside your house at Christmas?
34. Have you ever placed a jewel encrusted tissue box on your rear parcel shelf?
35. Have you ever visited a Little Chef or Happy Eater apart from to use the loos in desperation?
36. Have you ever cut out and used money off coupons from magazines?
37. Have you ever received a Christmas Card from your local Kebab house?
38. Do you know anyone from Penge?
39. Have you ever bought and used "Shake n' Vac"?
40. Are any of your parents or family well known "down the precinct"?
Now tot up your "Yes" scores and check below to see if you are a pikey:
0 - Yes answers
You live in Mayfair and spend all your time at Harvey Nicks. All your friends are called Henry or Henrietta and you've never even heard of Top Shop. You don't drive as your chauffeur takes you everywhere. You live on a macrobiotic diet carefully prepared for you by Jamie Oliver. The only airlines you recognise are those that daddy owns. The only pikey you have ever come across is a stuffed one created by Damien Hurst and showing at the Tate Modern.
1-5 - Yes answers
You're generally far removed from pikey land, however, your brother once introduced you to a girl who lived on an estate and shattered your Illusions of Barratt Homes being a character from an Emily Bronte novel. You like expensive shops and generally only travel by London Taxi. Your mother once served you fish fingers, however you have adapated enough in adult life to only purchase Tesco's finest crab cakes as a substitute. You have the presence of mind to sneer at a bottle of Freixenet.
6-10 - Yes answers
You are definately entering the danger zone here. You have owned at sometime in your life a pet fish won from a funfair. You regularly buy Superdrug's own brand toiletries but ensure you carry them home in a Clinique carrier bag. You have a number of gold cards and a run a respectable enough car, however, you would do well to remove the "Baby on Board" sticker from the back. You enjoy good food and wine courtesy of Delia Smith's home cookery course and have been to University.
11-15 - Yes answers
You have a whiff of dog blanket about you and your shoes need to be resoled. You enjoy garden centres and eating out at country pubs. You're quite well known at the local KwikFit and think nothing of sticking a Bart Simpson doll to your rear seat window. You have often enjoyed a curry or kebab after a night down the pub and have used a doorway as a public toilet. It is likely that you have been arrested for a minor offence and count George Best as an idol. You are likely to have been educated to an A-Level standard.
16+ - Yes answers
There is no hope for you - you are well and truly an escapee from Pikey Island. You will now forever be known as first name "Pikey pikey do as ya likey" surname. You think that Blue Nun is a choice wine and always cook Spag Bol at dinner parties. None of your home cutlery matches and a few of your mugs have established chipping to the handles. Every room in your house is painted Magnolia and you have a dado rail in your living room. You name your children after pop or filmstars and buy the Sunday Sport as an informative newspaper. Your car is made by Ford and has fag burns in the driver seat. You've only been to Spain on holiday. You are a Pikey!
May 27, 2003
telephone preference service
Stop SMS & telemarketing spam with telephone preference service
May 25, 2003
I tell a lie
I tell a lie... prom night is coming back... Prom Night is coming back this summer! From July, all your dreams will come true. A Saturday night? Yep. In central London? That's right (on Curtain Road, to be exact - in Shoreditch). With a late license? You bet - we'll be on until 2 or 3am.
poodle rock
a new club from the prom night people: poodle rock. guess this means no more "take on me" then.
May 23, 2003
SARS
eating pussy - A top Hong Kong scientist says it is likely the deadly SARS virus that has killed almost 700 people worldwide jumped to humans from civet cats
May 20, 2003
May 19, 2003
which puma are you?
The Roma. You're a freak. A cool 'n' crazy sort of
hipster. You know what it's like to spend a
night on the town, to eat only french fries and
macaroons, to walk on the wild side. You're to
hip to hop, and yet you hop anyway. Kudos to
you, big guy.
Which Puma shoe are YOU?
brought to you by Quizilla
May 18, 2003
May 15, 2003
Khyber Pass = Arse
Why Carry On Cleo and Carry On Up the Khyber are two of the best films ever
May 14, 2003
May 13, 2003
The Church
The Church Message Board - read about a load of degenerate Aussies & Kiwis (and even sadder Brits)
May 09, 2003
Filter out stupid tribes 2 taunts
Filter out stupid tribes 2 taunts
May 08, 2003
Microsoft Admits Passport Was Vulnerable
Microsoft Admits Passport Was Vulnerable
May 02, 2003
consoles-a-plenty
the king of the nerdlingers' gaming setup
